In this post, I would like to talk about meditation and how it affects the Tourette.
A lot of my friends tell me that I need to try to do meditation or yoga, which will help me relax my system and deal with the Tourette. There were a few times when I tried to do it in my dance therapy group in Beer Sheva. We do meditation at the end of every activity. Every time that I try to do it, my tics appear in higher intensity, and this interferes with my ability to do the meditation.
Lately, I can’t get my soul into a complete relaxation because every time that I try the Tourette raises its head and interferes and it frustrates me every time. I would like to experience a state of complete relaxation which I think will especially help me, but I don’t succeed. There is a point in the movie “The Road Within” where the hero says that you can’t say to a person with Tourette to relax because the Tourette won’t let him. In my opinion, he is right, and I sympathize with this sentence completely.The Tourette will always be there, and I found that in meditation the Tourette will use it to raise its head.
My soul is in a constant war between the Tourette and trying to have a normal life. Lately, I found my internal strength to deal with it in my life, but when I am doing meditation, I am losing this ability. The Tourette and the tics are becoming worse, and they are quite noticeable. It also happens to me a lot before I go to bed and sometimes I need to take valium to relax.
Because of that, I never succeed in doing meditation or activities that require self-relaxation.I believe that only when I will get to a place that I can channel my inner strength to gather the self-relaxation, I will be able to perform these activities.
I am looking for the day when I will be able to go to a place of self-relaxation without the Tourette raising its head and interfering. To a place where I will be able to do meditation which I think will especially help me. Now I am not at this place but I am working on it, and I hope that I am on the right path. I want to believe that I will get there someday, to the place where I will be able to do self-relaxation without the Tourette raising its head. and that it will be soon.